When I am feeling crappy about something in my life, I like to take a little extra time picking out my clothes, style my hair, and throw on a little makeup. I think the extra time taking care of my self boosts my mood and looking good definitely helps me to feel good. I had to do that this morning. I have on some of my favorite pants and a new shirt. I took the extra time to blow dry my hair and put on a little makeup. I did all this depiste wednesday being my early day (I teach a 6:30-7:30am yoga class on Wednesdays). I look pretty good, and I feel a little better. Look I even gave the blog a face lift! Maybe that will be enough to boost me back into loving the life I already have.
Let me first give props to the amazing Fran at small bird studios for creating my sweet new header. She was great to work with and put up with my endless nick-pickyness. In the beginning I had no idea what I wanted and by the end I got exactly what I wanted. I hope some of you will consider working with her if you want to jazz up your blog face! The header was a prize for participating in the lovely Ms. Breeze’s blog hop. Thank you Dandelion!! I am not sure what to use for the background so I will use these little circles for now, but I may play with it and see what I like.
And now I will get into why I feel so crappy, and why I don’t think the makeup will be enough to get me through this day without crying or biting someone’s head off. My ovaries and I had a fight. I don’t know what it was about or when it happened but I do know for sure that they are mad and giving me the silent treatment. I still have not ovulated. It’s day 19 or 20, I don’t even know anymore. I have not had any EWCM and my temps are all over the board. It was just above my normal coverline yesterday and now it is back under. My ovaries have been hurting since Friday, I usually get a little twinge of pain around ovulation so I was hopeful over the weekend. But now it’s been six days of this pain and no spike in temperature. BBT has been 100% reliable for me in showing if I ovulated or not so I think I am just screwed. I don’t know if I am building up cysts in there or what. I am at a loss, I don’t know what the heck to do. I think I might call my previous acupuncture practitioner, I know she is back in town and hopefully she is seeing patients again. The new guy is ok but she and I had it dialed when I worked with her last year. She got where with a certain combination of herbs and needles she could basically produce an egg right there on the table! Ok, it wasn’t that good, but we did have a pretty narrowed down regimen after months of trial and error. I was regular and happy and I did get pregnant. I’m sure this new guy could do the same thing but I don’t want months of trial and error. I only started seeing him because needle lady left town for a few months. I think about breaking up with him but then I start to worry that the success last time was just a fluke. And in all honesty I have been a little lazy in taking my supplements and I have snuck a little bit of sugar in pretty much every day.
Part of me wonders if it really is the stress of trying. When we were not trying and using condoms I was also lazy about my supplements and ate sugar like breathing and I ovulated on time every month plus or minus a few days. But now! Now that I am trying again the eggs are refusing to come out and play.
What ever I did ovaries I’m sorry!! I really really am. Look I made your blog pretty, can I have an egg now, pretty please?