One of my yoga students approached me after class and had noticed that I was no longer pregnant. She told me that she is a shamanic healer and would like to offer me a free healing session soul journey with her. I didn’t know anything about what this was but I was touched by her generosity and thought that it sure couldn’t hurt. I checked out her website and made an appointment to go. I drove to her house way in the middle of nowhere.
First I have to say she is super cool. She is an older lady with long grey hair (like my mom’s actually) she looks like a healer and a nurturer so I felt completely comfortable with her. Secondly, her house is bad-ass! It is a straw bail home and her husband builds them for a living. She wanted it to feel like she was living outside and it really does. Her house has real tree trunks for columns and she has plants and stones everywhere and even a pond with waterfall, inside! It’s so cool. I sat with her shortly and had some water and then we went outside and walked to her healing hut.
The hut has a beautiful elaborate entrance and then it is a small adobe walled room built into the earth. It was small and warm and round. It felt like a womb. I laid down on the cot she had and we got started. She explained that her spirit guide and my spirit guide got together and decided that I needed to have flower petals sprinkled on me so she did that and it smelled and felt lovely. Then I closed my eyes and she began calling to my spirit guide to direct her to parts of my soul that left me when they got scared.
There were drums and rattles and bells. It sounded really cool in that little space. I had no idea what to expect so I just laid there and relaxed. At one point in the drumming I felt full of light. This went on for a while, im not sure how long but based on the time I went in and then later when I left I’d say 30-45 min or so. Then she blew on my heart and into the top of my head. When it stopped she began to describe that my spirit had 5 missing pieces.
My spirit guide had taken her on a journey to find these parts. Now, I’ll just say that this was something new for me and I was slightly skeptical but open. As she described the parts she found I could feel myself becoming somewhat of a believer because I felt compassion and familiarity for the parts of my soul she was describing. She mentioned seeing me as a toddler, a middle school aged child, a college student, and a young adult. The things she described were very accurate to my life memories. The last part she described hit home the most. She said my spirit guide took her through the woods to a cliff that was on the ocean. She said it was a dangerous cliff and they climbed down to a cave with really torrent water going in and out of the cave. She said that I was in there in the dark shadows of the cave and as she walked towards me she could tell that I looked pregnant but I was bleeding. I was soaking wet from the water and looked completely swallowed up with sorrow. As she was describing this I started crying because it was exactly how I felt when I was going through finding out about the tri18 and then in terminating the pregnancy. I wanted to be strong so I blocked out the feeling she was describing, so evidently those feelings went and hid in this dangerous wet cave. As she brought me out an Indian woman (from India) showed up to protect that part of me, pretty cool. Now that all of these parts are returned to me I was instructed to talk to them and make them feel safe and at home. I can do that. Again I’m not sure what to believe about what happened since I haven’t really felt any different and I didn’t really feel anything at the time. But it was believable to some extent. I’m happy to have healing from anywhere I can get it.